“No” Is a Good Thing
posted in Words |First, I did not post last Tuesday, forgive me.
Tuesday evening I went to a business networking event. There were about 100 business people from our area talking, making connections and sharing great ideas. What I found interesting, however, is that two of my more prominent conversations had nothing to do with business, per se. Instead, we discussed the need to “take care of yourself.”
By taking care of yourself I don’t mean we need to “watch our backs,” “look out for number one” or do “whatever it takes to climb the corporate ladder.” What I mean is that we need to simply take time to care for our own emotional, spiritual and physical needs. As one gentleman put it, “Everyone talks about it, but no one does it.”
You need to do it. You need to give yourself time to nurture your spirit; time to decompress, relax, reflect and rejuvenate.
How you do this is up to you. You may find that a long bubble bath does the trick. Or maybe it’s a walk in the park, or a trip to the beach or the mountains. It could be as simple as going to the library, checking out and reading a good book. Maybe building something with your hands is what relaxes you or sitting in a café journaling. Whatever it is, it is important to make time for you; your needs are important.
Without the time to decompress we run from task to task stressed out which eventually leads to burn out. And when we are stressed and/or burned out we are of no value to those around us.
You’ve come across people like this. They are tired, snippy, grumpy and much less effective in everything they do. These are the people who look to be holding it together, but in spending just a few minutes with then you realize they are on the verge of snapping. They are either frantically living or walking around in a semi-comatose state just trying to cope.
All too often we allow ourselves to get to this point because we won’t stop and take time for ourselves. We make the excuse that time for ourselves is selfish, but the reality is that time for ourselves is necessary for us to serve those around us - both in our personal and professional lives.
“But, I don’t have the time to take a walk, or read a book, or pamper myself.” The truth of the matter is that we can always make time for our priorities even if that means saying “No” to commitments and opportunities.
In fact, saying “No” is one of our best weapons against burn out. We are inundated with good opportunities. Opportunities to join teams and committees, to mentor people coming behind us, to give our time pro bono, to take on another project, to serve in civic groups, the list goes on. I am a great proponent of these things and participate in many of them.
However, I’ve learned that I cannot accept every opportunity that comes my way. I must say “No” to good things in order to maintain my sanity I must leave time in my schedule to take care of myself of I will not do anything well. As a result I often say “No” to the good in order to accept the great.
Choose a Better Life by choosing to care for your own needs. As you do you will be better equipped to serve those around you and you will excel in your commitments.